Who's a happy cavy?
New Zealand Listener|August 26, September 1 2023
In Carl Bland's new play, a guinea pig has something to say about human nature.
LINDA HERRICK
Who's a happy cavy?

The setting of Auckland writer-actor-artist-director Carl Bland’s new play I Want To Be Happy is usually hidden from public view. A science lab that tests products on live animals, it’s a place Bland describes as “a prison for the innocent” in a show he says is “sometimes very funny and sometimes very sad”.

The “innocent” one is Binka, a guinea pig humanised by the venerable Jennifer Ludlam in her first thespian outing as a rodent – although, Bland hastens to add, “we are trying to avoid putting her in a big guinea pig costume”.

Guinea pigs are social animals usually kept in groups as family pets, but in this cold place, Binka’s most consistent companion is lovelorn lab assistant Paul, played by Joel Tobeck. Both have strong memories and big emotions.

For instance, says Bland, Binka understands that she is in a cage and that she has been alone for “an awfully long time”.

“She remembers her mother and being a child,” he says. “She is on her own, then suddenly they introduce another guinea pig called MyOne [played by Milo Cawthorne] and they have a little family and she realises what love is. Then there’s a trauma for her and they introduce another guinea pig called Whistler, who is a complete bastard.”

Through the magic of stagecraft, we see Binka in her small cage, occasionally prodded by Paul with a tiny stick. Behind him, an enlarged version of the same cage offers close-ups of Binka – and her reactions when Paul approaches with what is to her a giant instrument of torment.

Although the audience can hear both points of view, Binka and Paul don’t understand each other – but Bland signals he might be able to manoeuvre them towards a position of mutual empathy.

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