'Emotional scars are deep, it affects your whole being'

Filipino women are challenging the Catholic Church and a conservative lobby to demand legal freedom from abusive or unhappy marriages. Maroosha Muzaffar hears their stories

- Maroosha Muzaffar

It took some time for Mavi Veratta Millora to realise that her marriage was not a fairytale. In the end, it turned out to be quite the opposite – her husband, she says, was unemployed and unfaithful, and the effort to keep her home running left her exhausted.

"I had to kick him out of our lives because it had become unhealthy and toxic for our children," Millora tells The Independent from Manila, Philippines. Her four children, having grown up in a conflicted household, encouraged her to leave the marriage. Her eldest was 16 or 17 years old at the time, she recalls.

After years of emotional turmoil, she decided to separate from her husband. It has been almost 12 years since. Her children have grown up. She has regained her strength and is doing much better in life. But the man legally remains her husband and can still stake claim to the family property.

"You cannot freely move on with your life, especially when it comes to the properties and all that you have worked for, for your children," she says.

Today, Millora is fighting for the right to divorce in the Philippines, the only country in the world besides the Vatican where divorce is illegal.

In May this year, the lower house of the Philippines parliament passed the Absolute Divorce Bill, legislation that could finally give those in unhealthy and unhappy marriages the right to apply for a divorce. The bill passed the House of Representatives and is awaiting Senate approval. It aims to set out a number of legal grounds for divorce, including abuse, infidelity, and abandonment.

As both an activist and a woman who stands to gain from the new law, the bill’s progress through parliament is a big victory for Millora, although she still expects a bumpy road ahead. She is not just fighting for a legal right but against a predominantly Catholic culture where divorce still carries huge stigma and the Church holds significant influence.