I was pregnant and so was MY SURROGATE

Angela and Jason Owens were willing to try anything to start a family

Most people who have experienced pregnancy will have their own special story to tell. The first flutters and first kicks, the excitement to meet the little person they’re growing. Ever since I can remember, I’d always looked forward to it, almost longed for it, and I always knew it would feel remarkable. But for me, being pregnant was so much more. After years of trying for a baby, I was having two! What makes my story special, is that I was carrying only one of them…

When my husband Jason and I started trying to get pregnant in 2017, we hoped it’d happen immediately but after eight months of trying and with test after test showing up negative, we were referred to a fertility specialist. We tried IUI (artificial insemination) then IVF, using health insurance from work – I was in healthcare and Jason worked as a data analyst – as well as our savings. When we found out I was pregnant after the first round of IVF in March 2018, we were so happy. Everything was finally coming together. But just seven weeks later, I miscarried. The heartbreak was like nothing I’d ever experienced before, it felt like all our dreams had been shattered. Determined not to give up, we tried again, but five weeks later, another miscarriage. The trauma was as fresh as the first time but our desire to become parents was stronger than ever.

By 2020, we’d had seven rounds of IVF that were either unsuccessful or ended in miscarriage, and spent more than £150,000 using our savings and some help from our parents. I began to accept that if I wanted to have the family I longed for, I might have to relinquish being pregnant myself. Maybe if I couldn’t carry our baby, someone else could.