Whenever I look at my wedding photos, I feel no joy. My make-up and wide smile were masking so much pain and fear, and the truth is that the man who vowed to love and protect me that day ended up almost destroying me.
Matthew Morrell was an old school friend who I bumped into while walking through our home city of Doncaster in summer 2013, aged 22. Later, he sent me a message and, as we got chatting, I remembered how much he'd always made me laugh. Having just been through a break-up, I wasn't looking for love but Matthew showered me with attention.
He arrived to pick me up for one of our first dates, at a restaurant in August 2013, with a bouquet of sunflowers, my favourites.
There was an undeniable d spark and, as we started dating, Matthew kept telling me how lucky he felt.
Kind and caring, he'd call every morning to check that I'd arrived safely at my supermarket job. Then, during a trip to York for our first anniversary in August 2014, he dropped to one knee and proposed.
I accepted and felt ecstatic as he slipped the silver and diamond ring on my finger.
By then, we'd got our own place and, weeks into our engagement, I was putting his jeans into the washing machine when I reached into the pocket and pulled out a condom.
Confusion swept over me - why would he be carrying one in his pocket? I marched upstairs to confront him and an argument erupted. Suddenly, he gripped my shoulders and pushed me hard down the stairs. As I flew back against the bannister, two of the wooden spindles broke. Stunned, I lay sobbing on the stairs in agony as Matthew just looked at me coldly.
This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber ? Sign In
This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber? Sign In
The dark side to your CHRISTMAS NIGHT OUT
Do you know what’s in your glass this party season?
IS THERE ANYTHING MORE NOSTALGIC THAN CHRISTMASES PAST?
Do you remember the anticipation before the big day, pondering endlessly about what should go on your Christmas list? I would lovingly write two or three things down, pop it into an envelope and leave it by the fireplace to be wafted up the chimney like something out of Mary Poppins.
The Christmas that CHANGED OUR LIVES
We speak to three women about their most wonderful time of year
Fix a festive FALL-OUT
Had too much of a good thing? Our expert tips will help you feel better quickly
Reunited for CHRISTMAS
After his rocky TV comeback, ts Philrelying on wife Steph this holiday season?
'I don't want a THREE DAY HANGOVER'
Lorraine Kelly on how she’ll be spending her first Christmas as a grandma
Mistletoe AND WINE
All Rose wanted was a little extra sparkle at Christmas
Would you spend more ON THE DOG THAN ON YOUR HUSBAND?
Brits are happy to fork out more on their pets’ gifts than on their other half’s, according to a study. We investigate….
A new ACT OF BETRAYAL
King Charles misses Harry 'desperately' but has the trust gone, writes Emily Andrews
PRINCE ANDREW AND FERGIE ARE EXPECTED FOR CHRISTMAS!
After a tough year for William and Kate, the Waleses are looking forward to Christmas and catching up with the Royal Family – including, it seems, Prince Andrew and Sarah, Duchess of York.