Tearing into my birthday presents, I was so excited to see what my husband Mark had got me. It was my 57th birthday in January 2021 and as I peeled back the paper, the words 23 and Me peeped out underneath. 'I thought you might want to give it another shot, Mark smiled. It was a DNA test - I'd done one from a different company a couple of years before to try and find my biological mum, but hadn't been successful. Maybe this time I'd have more luck. The next day, I put some saliva in a container, sealed up the kit and popped it in the post, full of hope that I'd finally find my long-lost mum.
Growing up, my parents Rochelle and David were very open with me about the fact I was adopted. I always felt loved but couldn't help feeling as though something was missing.
I often wondered about my birth mum and if I was like her. Then, when I was 16, I fell pregnant with my daughter Sara, and I gave birth just before my 17th birthday, in January 1981.
Despite my parents' initial shock, they helped me raise her, but it was tough. I was still so young myself and often felt overwhelmed. 'I wonder if this is how my biological mum felt when she had me?' I wondered. I longed to find out the truth about why she had given me up for adoption.
HEARTBREAKING DECISION
Then, when I was 21, I fell pregnant again after a fling. Straight away I realised couldn't keep the baby. I was just about managing to look after Sara, but knew I wouldn't be able to cope with another child. By now I had a job filing documents and money was tight. But terminating the pregnancy wasn't an option for me - I couldn't bear the thought. So, with my parents' support, I made the heartbreaking decision to go to an adoption agency.
This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber ? Sign In
This story is from the {{IssueName}} edition of {{MagazineName}}.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber? Sign In
FAST & THRIFTY DINNERS
Filling family meals to save you time and money
ARE VIRAL FITNESS TRENDS WORTH THE HYPE?
Keen to know if the workouts she sees online can actually make her fitter, Rachel Tompkins, 44, gives them a try
GO OUT OF SEASON
While some European cities seem to go into hibernation over winter, others just get better in the colder months
MY LIFE IN MUSIC
Monica Cafferky, 55, reveals how certain tunes bring back special memories
THE DECISION THAT CHANGED MY LIFE
After trying diets without success, Breanne Concannon, 31, was left feeling hopeless
MY TOY ΒΟΥ KEEPS ME YOUNG
For Trish Hughes, 44, the thrills of being married to a man 20 years younger is worth all the judgement
'THAT'S NOT MY BABY'
Lying in the hospital bed, my husband Michael had tears of happiness in his eyes as he showed me a photo on his phone. 'Here she is,' he said proudly. 'This is our beautiful baby girl.'I stared at the photo and shook my head. 'No, that's not my baby,' I said. 'There must be a mistake.'It was August 2010 and I'd not long before had an emergency caesarean. I'd not had a chance to see Winnie when she arrived as she'd been whisked away for tests because she was nearly two months premature.
CAUGHT IN THE ACT
Hayley, 45, has her son to thank for crucial evidence
'I'D LOVE TO DO EASTENDERS'
Loose Women's Linda Robson on the daytime show, dating and her next career move
Beckhams INSIDE THEIR PROPERTY EMPIRE
We take a look at the power couple's posh pads
