The Dangers Of ‘Should'

Shifting your mindset

- Jem N 

Many of us experience frustration in our riding. I’ve been thinking for a long time about why this is the case. We find ourselves fighting with our horses and leaving the yard disappointed and demotivated, when, in reality, this is something we do because we love it.

I can’t speak for everyone but, over the last few weeks and months, the causes of my own personal frustrations with my riding have really become clear to me. I hope that, by sharing my insights, I can help a few of you to feel the weight lift the way I have, since I realised one key thing:

SWAPPING EXPECTATIONS FOR APPRECIATIONS

One of the biggest things I’ve changed over the last few months is to swap what I expect my horse to do, for what I appreciate him doing. After every single ride, I spend the car journey home listing all the things that I’m grateful for in that session – and I promise you that, even if you didn’t achieve your goal, when you start looking for the small things your horse does to help you out and meet your demands, you’ll be humbled by just how much there is to be grateful for. I can’t tell you the happiness this gives me and the great benefits that it has brought to my relationship with my horse.

‘SHOULD’ IS A VERY DANGEROUS WORD