What Is Good Parenting?

The role of a parent – nurture versus nature.

- Ramya Gopalakrishna

Does a child come into the world pre-wired with certain characteristics that determine what he is going to be, or can parents and the environment influence his thinking and nature, especially during the formative years? As parents, this is something we ponder about a lot and it is the crux of the classic ‘Nurture versus Nature’ debate.

Research in fact shows that while some physical attributes such as hair colour are genetically inherited, drive, attitude and outlook can be shaped possibly by both genes and the environment. The Box on the right gives a partial list of where experts think parents can play a significant role. Children observe their parents all the time; parents are their role models and have a lot of influence in guiding and providing them the support they need to make wise choices.

Also, you will agree that parenting is a job that we are not likely to retire from. Starting with developing reading habits in your primary schooler to helping your tween balance academics and co curricular activities to guiding your teen in college choices, it is true that a parent’s journey is never complete.

How times have changed – the impact on parenting

Parenting has existed for as long as mankind has - why, then, is it so much under the scanner in the 21st century? Parents find themselves questioning and analysing their every move to check if it is right for the child. “Am I doing enough for my child to realise her potential? How much is too much? Am I stifling creativity?” Counsellors are inundated with queries, newspapers and magazines routinely carry articles about where parents are going horribly wrong (and some rare instances of what they are going right!). What is so dramatically different about parenting today?