He's So Bossy!

You think your child is assertive, but his classmates fi nd him obnoxious and don’t want to play with him anymore. Here’s how to help him.

- Dr Richard C. Woolfson

You have always encouraged your kid to be assertive and to behave like a leader. But now you have discovered that your four-year-old is so bossy, no one wants to play with him at parties.

You want to redress the balance, without denting his confidence or making him afraid to express his opinion when he is with his friends.

But first, it’s important to understand the difference between the two attitudes.

An assertive child:

• stands up for himself when confronted. He knows his own mind and is willing to express it clearly and objectively.
• states his opinion confidently and without offending the listener. His view is based on positive reasons, not on criticisms of his friends’ views.
• believes in himself while remaining sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of others around him. He doesn’t want to upset his peers.
• is given a leadership role by the other kids because they have confidence in him and willingly follow his directions.

On the other hand, a bossy child: