“That's Too Old-Fashioned”

This, and nine other things you say about parenting will ruin your relationship with your mum-in-law. DR RICHARD C. WOOLFSON shows you a better way to get out of sticky situations.

- Dr Richard C. Woolfson

DON’T SAY “I’m the baby’s mother, not you.”

Okay, Grandma can become over-excited such that she behaves as though your baby is hers. But that’s just because she is carried away with the moment, and she remembers what it was like when her first child was born. It’s better if you say: “I’d like to try things my way because I have so much to learn.”

DON’T SAY “That’s too old-fashioned; we do things differently nowadays.”

Of course, there are trends in baby care, just as in other areas of life. Instead of reminding your mum-in-law about her advancing years, explain there are now different opportunities, methods and equipment for parents.

DON’T SAY “You are visiting us too often, and we need some time to ourselves.”

You need time to adjust to your new family structure and you may find that Grandma’s frequent visits are intrusive.