We all love judging others – whether in person or on social media – but it can be bad for our well-being. Focus on what makes you happy instead...
You’re at a friend’s party and in walks her new neighbour. You strike up a conversation and she seems nice enough. Later, on your way home, you have a long discussion with your partner about her; her outfit, her behaviour, the fact that she seemed a bit smug.
Admit it, we all do it. It feels harmless and it can be a lot of fun. And is it any wonder? Look around – never before has judgement of others been so public or acceptable. Perhaps your guilty pleasure is watching hapless show contestants get fired or eliminated. Or it may be a spot of social media where you can voice opinions on everything, from a TV presenter’s hair to an actress’ cosmetic surgery.
But there’s a downside, and the truth is that we can become so obsessed with the lives of others that we forget that – sorry to break the news here – it’s actually none of our business. Whatever happened to the idea that if you cannot say something nice, don’t say anything at all? The instant gratification of all that sniping and one-upmanship may give us an instant buzz, but the negativity can feel relentless and, if we’re honest, sometimes leaves us feeling a little tawdry. And yet… we can’t seem to stop.
When judging turns bad
We judge others according to how we behave. So, the more we judge, the more we fear being judged, and that can make us paranoid.
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