How To: Hook Up Today

Rules and regulations on how to navigate consent within the hook-up culture in the #metoo era, the non-Weinstein way…

- Dr Nikki Goldstein

One of the biggest risks to a casual hook-up used to be either catching something or someone getting too emotionally involved. These days it seems the word “harassment” is commonly involved, making many on the dating scene a little apprehensive about their sexual ways. Yes, we are living in a different world, but don’t be scared or put off about making sexual advances because of what some call “a bad date” and others “harassment”. The problem with all of this is that what is deemed inappropriate or harassment can differ from person to person, so it’s important we are all on the same page, or at least try and establish what that page is when hooking up. You might have heard the word “consent” flying around these days. But it’s not just as simple as “yes” or “no”. It shouldn’t mean that all sexual advances and seductions are out the window, but there are things you need to know…

LISTEN TO YOUR GUT INSTINCT: 

If something doesn’t feel right, stop and flag it. Even though your “other brain” down below might be working overtime, allow some space for your actual second brain (your gut) to guide you. If you feel something might be off, stop and ask that person, “Are you OK? Is this alright for you?” If things continue and you still don’t feel right, call it. You have every right to stop, too.

THINK OF THE WOMEN CLOSE TO YOU IN YOUR LIFE: