This went on for several months. He would text me, I would reply, and at some point, I’d say “Shall we get that drink then?” He’d express interest but trying to make a plan was like pulling teeth. In the end, I’d let it go, assuming I’d read the room wrong. A few days would pass and then he’d be back with another question, “How was your weekend?” “What do you think of this article?” “Have you seen Russian Doll?” (it was 2019, okay?!)
Gen Z probably has a term for this kind of behaviour. Breadcrumbing, maybe. Benching, perhaps. But those terms only really make sense in the context of monogamy. When your relationship goal is to meet and “cuff” one person for a romantic and sexual relationship, any behaviour which skirts around the edges of this is going to be met with suspicion.
I’m not monogamous, and neither was this man. So why were we faffing about like this? Why not just be upfront about what we both wanted? Well, eventually that’s what I did. I told him I was enjoying chatting and I’d like to get to know him in person. I wasn’t looking for a pen pal. “What do you want from this?” I asked.
この記事は The Independent の December 12, 2023 版に掲載されています。
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この記事は The Independent の December 12, 2023 版に掲載されています。
7 日間の Magzter GOLD 無料トライアルを開始して、何千もの厳選されたプレミアム ストーリー、9,000 以上の雑誌や新聞にアクセスしてください。
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