It's Complicated: Grief In The Age Of Covid-19

Even as Covid keeps us isolated, loss surrounds us all. Some are seeking support from helplines and support groups

- Sonam Joshi

‘I had a video call with my husband and later that night he was gone,” says Mumbai-based Sneh Malhotra. Caring for her hospitalised brother-in-law and the rest of the family left her little time to grieve. “I didn’t cry when he died last year because I was trying to be strong for the whole family being the eldest,” she says. Within a fortnight, her brother-in-law also passed. “Somehow, we held it together for the children.” Later, however, she joined a support group. “I could finally share my grief and there was someone to hear me,” she recalls.

As Covid-19 stretches on, we’re all feeling a sense of collective grief. A study by researchers at Pennsylvania State University calculated that for every person who dies of Covid-19, nine loved ones are left behind. Even those who haven’t lost loved ones are grieving for what others have gone through. The broken heart emojis, and the ‘so sorry for your loss’ messages are never enough to convey what one feels. Then are the other losses: life before Covid, lost opportunities, jobs, freedoms and privacy.

“The pandemic has contributed to the grief-burden in the country both in number and in intensity and there are very little care provisions available,” says Dr Smriti Rana, director, programmes, Pallium India, which runs a helpline called Sukh Dukh.