Widowed & Pregnant ...But I Found Happiness Again

This Valentine’s Day, Crystal Adkins reveals how a terrible loss led to new love.

- Kira Agass And Rebecca Wright

Even when it’s something small, I don’t like lying. I’ve always thought it’s better to tell the truth. That was until march 2011, when, as I held my daughter in my arms and she screamed for her daddy, I told her the ultimate lie – that he would be oK, that everything would be fine.

But while I wanted to protect her from the truth, even just for a few moments longer, I couldn’t convince myself. Because as we stood there, with sirens blaring around us, and my unborn son kicking in my stomach, I knew nothing would ever be the same again. 

I was 23 when I met Jorge at a friend’s party in 2004. The first thing I noticed about him was his infectious laugh – the kind that starts in your belly and makes your cheeks hurt. While everyone else was drinking, we sat on the sofa. We told each other about our careers – mine as a nurse and Jorge’s as a lawyer – and talking quickly turned to flirting.

With Jorge’s parents both Cuban, he promised that one day he’d teach me how to salsa dance. I remember chuckling at how presumptuous he was – I hadn’t even given him my number yet! But it wasn’t long before I was introducing him to my mum.

The practical joker amongst his friends, Jorge loved planning elaborate pranks (the most notorious of which featured a stuffed alligator), and he didn’t know the meaning of a lazy Saturday – he always had to be doing something. But while he was always hyper, he was also the adult in our relationship.

Terrifying moment

After we moved in together, Jorge took care of the bills and arranged for the repair men to come and fix the internet when it broke. While I regularly teased him for never coming through on his promise to teach me to salsa, I knew I could count on him, no matter what.