I've always known what I want - it's just hard to find

TV star Vanessa Feltz invites OK! into her amazing abode as she shares the story of her success and heartbreak from her new book

- EMMELINE SAUNDERS AND JANE WARREN

At 62 and back on the dating scene, Vanessa Feltz needs just three words to describe her past relationships. “A car crash”, she says. “My entire love life has been a complete abomination, a catastrophe, an absolute f**king car crash. People might think I’m an absolute fool. And they’d not be wrong.”

That’s why now, speaking from her stunning north London home, she’s made herself a promise – to never be belittled or used for her fame by men again.

It’s a lesson she’s learnt the hard way. “I’ve been single for 21 months. It’s not my happy state,” Vanessa tells us. “But I’m not going to be plunging in with any old renegade who says, ‘I like your eyes.’ I’ve got to have learnt something from all of this, haven’t I?”

The “this” to which she refers is her 2023 split with partner of 16 years Ben Ofoedu, after her daughters received a tip-off that he was cheating. She confronted him while in the back of a black cab one night on their way to a party in Waterloo. After much spluttering and protestations of innocence, he finally confessed. Furious, Vanessa threw open the taxi door – and threw herself out into the rain. Her “beloved” fiancé drove on to the party.

The same “this” also refers to her ex-husband, the father of her children, orthopaedic surgeon Michael Kurer, who after 16 years of seemingly blissful marriage, turned round one day, asked for a divorce and called her “disgustingly fat”. He put her on a 12-week “trial period”, then walked out after six.

Today Vanessa is happy to show us around her unique home – an 18th-century Gothic folly she calls Feltz Towers. It’s packed full of eccentricities, including some faux Roman frescos which were there when she moved in 20 years ago. There’s a charming caricature of her in a fetish outfit on one wall and a side table etched with the face of Leigh Francis. The dining table has been folded away to make floor space for parties. But one thing you won’t find in there much is… Vanessa.