MINDFUL ROMANCE

You're basically acting out a gratitude journal.

- SAMANTHA VINCENTY

IF YOU'VE BEEN A HABITUAL TIKTOK SCROLLER SINCE MAY 2020, you've probably come across one of the 71 000 videos with a soundtrack of TikTok user Ashley Ward's part inspirational, part instructional call-to-action: "You have to start romanticising your life," a voice says, as the camera hovers over a group of friends on a beach before slowly zooming in on Ashley as she lies down on a towel. "You have to start thinking of yourself as the main character. Because if you don't, life will continue to pass you by, and all the little things that make it so beautiful will continue to go unnoticed.”  The main-character-esque sentiment that 'life moves pretty fast, and if you don't stop and look around once in a while you could miss it' isn't new - it's a quote from the literal main character of the 1986 teen comedy Ferris Bueller's Day Off. It is, essentially, a form of mindfulness rooted in Buddhist practices. It also sounds a lot like the presence aspect of the Danish tradition of hygge, and the positive psychology concept of savouring. But the #romanticiseyourlife TikTok trend, originally sparked by Ashley's video, is still striking a chord more than two years and 782 million views later for a reason. Zooming in on the details of your life has the potential to increase gratitude and joy, Dr Rachel Hoffman, Chief Clinical Officer at mental health startup Real, tells Glamour.

Videos that have the hashtag #romanticiseyourlife on TikTok run the gamut content-wise, but three subgenres have emerged. You'll find plenty of sleek influencer edits full of beautiful places and things. There's also a strong cottagecore contingent (a TikTok rabbit hole in itself), in which people perform an idealised English countryside way of romanticising their lives, replete with antique tea sets, lace collar dresses and all-floral everything.