Will you know me in heaven?

What do you look like at 10? Did your skew front toothies at last straighten out? Do you still have your glorious uncontrollable bush of pure red hair?

- CARINE HARTMAN

I wouldn't know, because I haven't seen you in three years, my darling grandchild. And it makes me sad. Not angry, just incredibly sad.

Because every year I see your dad on this day curling up into a little ball not facing the world. And every year I have to tell my son: "I don't know what to do."

But I maybe do know. I can, as your Ouma, launch a "visiting rights" action. And probably not get very far because your mother will cite my "red wine" again.