Fist bumps, Putin and going topless: Johnson's G7 week

When you've lost two by-elections, which happened only because one of your MPs sexually assaulted a child and another watched tractor-based pornography in the House of Commons, there could hardly be a more apposite time for a prime minister to have a little statesman's holiday.

- TOM PECK

So how did it go then, Johnson's week in the global spotlight, his bid to restore a bit of dignity to whatever it is he might have left to which any dignity at all can still be restored? It's hard to squeeze in all the edited highlights, principally because there are none of them, but we can but try. There was the bit where he sat around a table with the rest of the G7 leaders and told them "we should take our shirts off to show we are tougher than Putin”.

It's not quite as awkward as you might think. Theresa May notwithstanding, world leaders are more often than not blessed with phenomenal people skills, and Johnson being his usual tedious, bumbling self appeared not to bother them any more than normal. Macron wisely said nothing. Justin Trudeau waffled a bit before changing the subject. Putin, meanwhile, has already issued a direct response. "I don't know how they wanted to get undressed, above or below the waist," he said. "But I think it would be a disgusting sight in any case."