IT was time to plan the official Christmas celebrations again, and the village community committee were, as usual, struggling to agree on anything.
Oh, they broadly agreed on the activities that should take place, but not on their precise content.
Carol singing by torchlight, for example.
"We've had complaints that it's a bit boring," Julia, the chair, explained.
"And suggestions to add a few more contemporary songs." "How contemporary?" Mrs Reece asked.
She was the committee's moral compass who was permanently stuck at a bitter north-east. With intermittent heavy snow.
Julia looked down the list of suggested songs.
She doubted she'd even get "Santa Baby" past the woman, let alone some of the more fun suggestions.
She had to suppress a giggle when her eyes rested on "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer".
She'd never heard of the song before, but when she'd listened to it online she had enjoyed the tale of Grandma walking home after one eggnog too many.
"Let's face it," Dennis, the butcher, cut in. "That 'Lullay Lullay' song "The 'Coventry Carol'?" Mrs Reece interrupted.
"That's the fella. It's a bit of a dirge." "Bit of a dirge? That song represents centuries of English tradition. It's refined, it's dignified, it's -" "It's about King Herod killing all those little babies," Dennis announced.
"Well, yes," Mrs Reece conceded.
"People want cheering up at Christmas. It's a time of rejoicing, not being reminded of man's inhumanity to man." "What about something like 'Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire'?" Julia suggested, before the discussion degenerated into a heated debate.
"Who could object to a bit of Bing Crosby?" "Well." Mrs Reece sniffed.
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