What Does Being Strong Mean To You?

What does being strong mean to you? For Saraswati Rachel, a survivor of domestic violence, it's the courage to acknowledge one's vulnerabilities, and to practise self-compassion.

- Saraswati Rachel

Six years ago, I found myself caught in the throes of an abusive relationship. It was barely half a year in, and the violence culminated on a night when my ex-boyfriend hit me so hard, I was hospitalised for three weeks.

I had a brain haemorrhage from him strangling me and slamming my skull against the wall; my left-hand bone snapped into two when I tried to block his torrential punches; my nose, eye socket and facial bones were smashed, and I required reconstructive surgery, including a plate for my broken eye socket to hold my eyeball in place.

Now, most people have already formed impressions of the characteristics of abused women - that these women are meek, subservient to, and dependent on the abusive men they choose to be with. What else could explain their decision to remain in such a toxic relationship? In my case, I was not even married to my abuser. It's often unfathomable why anyone would willingly stay in a violent relationship not bound by legalities or children, especially after multiple incidents of physical abuse.