Trust Your Instincts

Have faith in your own abilities and banish negative thoughts to become a more confident, calmer mum overnight

- Gemma Briggs

NO sooner have you become pregnant than you are inundated with advice from friends, family and healthcare professionals. It’s easy to become overloaded with information and begin to doubt your own instincts. But by applying simple mind management techniques, you can become a confident and calm mum.

HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF

Accept that people will offer you advice because they are trying to help. Listen to what they have to say but always have faith in your own opinions. “I think often the mother’s instinct is the good one,” says psychologist Dr Andrew Mayers. “It’s good to hear advice, but as a new mum you are in a vulnerable place. Appreciate that the advice has been well-meant, but do not see it as a criticism. Many mums will struggle if, for example, a midwife says not to hold a baby a certain way when feeding. Do what you are most comfortable with, as long as it doesn’t pose any risks.”

IGNORE PEER PRESSURE

Pregnancy and parenthood can bring expectations that new mums, especially those having a first baby, feel pressurised into meeting. Put your own needs above those of others. ‘New mums often find, for example, a pressure to breastfeed. Everyone says ‘breast is best’ (and it usually is) but that pressure comes at the moment of vulnerability when a woman has just given birth,” says Andrew. “If her mood is low or there have been complications, then the pressure to breastfeed becomes an additional worry that just makes it worse. If you don’t feel able to do something, then don’t.”