Are you an overthinker?

Having a mind on overdrive can be harmful to your mental health. Ali Horsfall finds it's easier than you think to break the cycle for good

I was having dinner with an old friend when it dawned on me that I hadn't processed word of the conversation. Despite nodding along, my mind was elsewhere and I could barely concentrate on our catch-up. Why was I so distracted? The truth is, having just got back from a wedding, my brain was busy running the required post-mortem. It went something like this: Was that family member 'off' with me? Was I dancing too much or not enough? Did I get the dress code wrong? Between mouthfuls of food and sips of wine, I also silently unpicked a conversation I'd had with my neighbour weeks ago.

You'd think that this 'thought salad' would have been enough for one night, but there's more. Back home, I replayed the entire evening in my mind and felt guilty I wasn't fully present for my friend. I drafted a lengthy text explaining my lack of attention. I then obsessed over whether to send it, before pressing delete. Argh!

So, I'll admit, I'm a chronic overthinker. In fact, I spend such a large portion of my time mentally going over scenarios, second-guessing every decision I make and rehashing conversations that it can feel like a full-time job. Having a mind that doesn't switch off is tiring and stressful, and potentially harmful to mental health.

KNOW THE SIGNS

'Overthinking is generally linked to a state of hypervigilance, which in simple terms means living in a state of threat or fear. It can also be linked to regret, loss or obsessing about something, explains psychotherapist Owen O'Kane*. 'Being preoccupied with thinking, poor concentration and spending lots of time worrying, analysing, ruminating or predicting outcomes are classic signs that you're an overthinker.'