Do You Have Holiday Asshole Disorder?
Cosmopolitan - South Africa|December 2016

Your friends are holed up at home but that doesn’t stop you from posting pics of your tropical vacay. Emma Markezic explains why you’re a holiday asshole

Do You Have Holiday Asshole Disorder?

EARLIER THIS YEAR, I happened to have a couple of trips planned back-to-back. (Totally not my fault – everyone I know decided to get married in glorious locations within weeks of each other, just FYI.) This meant that, for months on end, my social media was filled with photos of Yorkshire’s dales, Tuscany’s vineyards, California’s boulevards … I probably shouldn’t go on. Instagram made it look as though I was on a never ending holiday. I wasn’t, of course – I was also madly working in airports and skipping touristy delights in order to meet deadlines. But I certainly wasn’t uploading photos of me eating Niknaks for dinner (cheese, not spicy beef; I’m not an animal) under the romantic glow of my laptop screen.

After a while, however, even my best friends stopped double-tapping. They simply tired of me posting pics from, well, everywhere but here. Each week that went by was a constant reminder that I was still travelling and they were still standing by the printer clearing paper jams. How we’ve managed to invent spray-on skin and not a printer that doesn’t have digestive problems is beyond me – but really, that’s another highly un-Instagrammable incident, so let’s move on.

Did the reality of my trips stop me from posting pics of palm trees and ski goggles? It did not. If anything, it made me even more determined to get the best shot of whatever vista or pasta or seaside I was experiencing at the time. I’d even have the timing worked out, to make sure that everyone back home was awake and could truly appreciate the majesty of my feed. And that’s about the time I realised that I’m a holiday douche-canoe. Which, by the way, is someone who exceeds the normal limits of douchery, and does so on holiday, no less. What a shambles.

Denne historien er fra December 2016-utgaven av Cosmopolitan - South Africa.

Start din 7-dagers gratis prøveperiode på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av utvalgte premiumhistorier og 9000+ magasiner og aviser.

Denne historien er fra December 2016-utgaven av Cosmopolitan - South Africa.

Start din 7-dagers gratis prøveperiode på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av utvalgte premiumhistorier og 9000+ magasiner og aviser.

FLERE HISTORIER FRA COSMOPOLITAN - SOUTH AFRICASe alt
Marc Buckner
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

Marc Buckner

The Bachelor SA Season 2’s star is here to make you swoon. Find out why boss babes are ready to risk it all for this adventurous dog lover.

time-read
1 min  |
May 2020
I Tested Positive For The Alzheimer's Gene At 26 Years Old
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

I Tested Positive For The Alzheimer's Gene At 26 Years Old

A DNA testing kit is like a crystal ball, but what if you don’t like what you see?

time-read
3 mins  |
May 2020
Basically No-One Has A 28-Day Menstrual Cycle
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

Basically No-One Has A 28-Day Menstrual Cycle

Brought to you by: the idea of a ‘normal’ period is a lie

time-read
2 mins  |
May 2020
For Those Times When You're Like, ‘I Love You, But You're Annoying...'
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

For Those Times When You're Like, ‘I Love You, But You're Annoying...'

Coupledom can be hard!

time-read
5 mins  |
May 2020
How To Get Sh*t Done
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

How To Get Sh*t Done

Calling all procrastinators: sometimes getting started on a new project or goal can be the hardest part. Here’s how to stop putting it off and actually press go

time-read
5 mins  |
May 2020
Is Rage Bait Okay?
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

Is Rage Bait Okay?

It has become the new engagement strategy for many brands. Companies bait their followers into engaging with their content around topics that cause outrage. But is this okay? Social -media strategists Talya Goldberg and Jabulile Dlamini -Qwesha share their views.

time-read
2 mins  |
May 2020
Is Cardio A Scam? And 7 Other Not-stupid Questions About Fitness Things
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

Is Cardio A Scam? And 7 Other Not-stupid Questions About Fitness Things

Thanks for calling 0800 -WTF- Is -This

time-read
3 mins  |
May 2020
Hold The Phone
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

Hold The Phone

Zozibini Tunzi is here to remind you all to Take. Up. Space. She’s rewriting the pageantry rulebook, and she wants you to join in (in a bath, wearing sparkly boots, because that’s just how we roll).

time-read
10 mins  |
May 2020
How To Tell It Like It Is *And Finally Get A Promotion*
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

How To Tell It Like It Is *And Finally Get A Promotion*

Receiving constructive criticism on your work can be terrifying. But do it right and it can be a career game-changer.

time-read
5 mins  |
May 2020
What Makes A Compulsive Liar?
Cosmopolitan - South Africa

What Makes A Compulsive Liar?

We all do it. Tell those lit t le white lies to ourselves, and others. But what about those for whom lying is a way of life? Catriona Harvey-Jenner investigates the rise of a new kind of scammer.

time-read
10 mins  |
May 2020