I let my kids make the rules

Nic Bescoby, 30, practises a parenting technique that would terrify most…

- MISHAAL KHAN, HARRIET WHITEHEAD

It’s 11pm on a school night at our home in Rochdale and, while most children are tucked up in bed, my kids George, eight, Ellie, seven, and Aimee, six, are still wide awake. No, they’ve not had a scary dream, and they aren’t being naughty, they’re just happily watching TV in the living room. And I couldn’t be happier about it. I know they’ll go to bed when they want to.

When George was a toddler, I spent my days running after him and telling him off. ‘George! Don’t do that!’ I’d shout as yet another ornament tumbled to the floor, breaking into pieces. I lost count of how often I’d have to send him to the naughty step and I grew more and more frustrated. I just couldn’t understand why my methods weren’t working.

You see, with a background in childcare, as soon as George had been born in April 2011, I’d created a strict routine for him, and I did the same for his sister, Ellie, when she was born 18 months later. There were strict rules, a routine, set mealtimes, a 6pm bedtime. When George misbehaved, he was scolded and when he was a good boy, he was rewarded. But by the time he was two, it became a daily battle. I was exhausted and George obviously hated the structure too.

Changing overnight