The enduring love of my chosen family
Time|November 20, 2023
Family is essential. It's also challenging. Here, tips and reflections on navigating it all
ZOOEY ZEPHYR
The enduring love of my chosen family

IN AUGUST, I SPENT 10 DAYS VISITING MY FIANCÉE ERIN and her son Andy in Maryland. Erin and I were celebrating our birthdays, and my soon-to-be stepson was about to start third grade. During my stay, Erin and I told Andy a series of collaborative bedtime stories: Erin would start, and whenever Andy wanted, he'd say "switch," and I'd jump in to tell the next part of the story. Together we spun tales of siblings who defeated an oil dragon in a magical realm made of paint, solved puzzles in a world made of food, and more. On the night before the first day of school, the siblings had escaped from inside a giant cyclops, and as we tucked Andy into bed, we wondered aloud about what both the next story and the school year might hold.

"Thank you for loving me," Erin said as we walked downstairs to savor the quiet hours between when Andy goes to bed and when we follow suit.

"Easiest thing I've ever done." My standard response. A cute little ritual we started shortly after we'd found the courage to say, "I love you," meant to express both the ease of our love and our gratitude for it.

I met Erin, a fellow activist, in February 2022 amid a moment of crisis for trans people. Texas' governor had already ordered the department of family and protective services to investigate families who were suspected of providing gender-affirming care to their transgender children. Trans youth were not only at risk of losing access to their health care but also of being taken away from their parents and homes. I took calls from parents who loved Texas, who had lived there for generations, yet were terrified that the state was no longer a safe place to raise their kids. Erin and I volunteered to help families raise funds and find safer states to relocate to, and it was in this work we found one another.

Denne historien er fra November 20, 2023-utgaven av Time.

Start din 7-dagers gratis prøveperiode på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av utvalgte premiumhistorier og 9000+ magasiner og aviser.

Denne historien er fra November 20, 2023-utgaven av Time.

Start din 7-dagers gratis prøveperiode på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av utvalgte premiumhistorier og 9000+ magasiner og aviser.

FLERE HISTORIER FRA TIMESe alt
How Trump Won
Time

How Trump Won

THE FORMER PRESIDENT'S RE-ELECTION IS THE NEXT STEP IN A POLITICAL CAREER UNLIKE ANY OTHER IN AMERICAN HISTORY

time-read
10+ mins  |
November 25, 2024
Zak Brown The McLaren Racing CEO on Formula One in the U.S., his team's chase for a championship, and the future propulsion of the automobile
Time

Zak Brown The McLaren Racing CEO on Formula One in the U.S., his team's chase for a championship, and the future propulsion of the automobile

The McLaren F1 team is in the running for its first Formula One constructors' championship since 1998. What's that like? I'm kind of living on the edge of my seat. That's why sport is always going to be one of the most engaging forms of entertainment for people around the world.

time-read
2 mins  |
November 25, 2024
Say Nothing speaks volumes
Time

Say Nothing speaks volumes

IN 1972, AT THE BLOODY HEIGHT OF the Troubles, home invaders abducted a widowed mother of 10 named Jean McConville from her Belfast apartment. Her children never saw her alive again.

time-read
3 mins  |
November 25, 2024
Portrait of the artist in his ninth decade
Time

Portrait of the artist in his ninth decade

AS A CURATOR AT THE PHILADELPHIA MUSEUM OF ART, Eleanor Nairne is very particular about how an artwork should be placed. \"I always say that you have to ask the work if it's sat comfortably,\" she says.

time-read
5 mins  |
November 25, 2024
No rest for the songs of Wicked
Time

No rest for the songs of Wicked

THE WICKED WITCH OF THE WEST HAS BEEN A FIXTURE in American culture for nearly 125 years. After coming to life in 1900 with L. Frank Baum's novel The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, she rose to prominence onscreen in 1939, portrayed by Margaret Hamilton as a sinister old lady intent on ruining an innocent girl's wish to go home.

time-read
5 mins  |
November 25, 2024
SENTIMENTAL VALUE
Time

SENTIMENTAL VALUE

With Here, Robert Zemeckis stays true to his unlikely blend of new technologies and old-fashioned storytelling

time-read
6 mins  |
November 25, 2024
TIME 100 CLIMATE
Time

TIME 100 CLIMATE

These are the 100 most influential leaders driving business climate action

time-read
10 mins  |
November 25, 2024
BABY TALK
Time

BABY TALK

UNSURE ABOUT HAVING KIDS? THERAPIST MERLE BOMBARDIERI CAN HELP YOU FIGURE IT OUT

time-read
10 mins  |
November 25, 2024
The many horrors of the Pelicot rape trial
Time

The many horrors of the Pelicot rape trial

THE TRIAL OF DOMINIQUE PELICOT, THE MAN IN THE South of France who pleaded guilty in September to charges of secretly drugging his wife of 50 years, Gisele, and, over the course of about a decade, filming dozens of men as they had sex with her while she was sedated, would have been disturbing enough just as the story of an epically vile husband.

time-read
5 mins  |
November 25, 2024
Health Matters
Time

Health Matters

COVID-19 MAY NOT BE A PUBLIChealth emergency anymore, but you still need your yearly shot. In fact, it seems to peak about twice a year: once during the traditional respiratory-disease season in the fall and winter, and once during summer.

time-read
3 mins  |
November 25, 2024