No, I'm not being funny, not being arch, but I think you deserved to be taxed. And taxed properly. You are not only a public nuisance, but you take up approximately 10 per cent more space than anyone else on the bus or the train, and therefore should be punished. Hashtag not even joking.
And this tax should not just be a token, either, but something properly punitive, a figure that affects your ability to pay your rent or the mortgage on your house. Something you're not going to forget in a hurry.
Tourists I can forgive as they know no better, and nor should they, especially the Americans. If you're over here from the Midwest, the Ozarks or the wilds of Oregon, and you're bumbling along on the Circle line between various London museums, inevitably lost, then I think it's fine for you to turn around suddenly and whack some poor unsuspecting schoolkid in the face.
Denne historien er fra June 18, 2024-utgaven av Evening Standard.
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Denne historien er fra June 18, 2024-utgaven av Evening Standard.
Start din 7-dagers gratis prøveperiode på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av utvalgte premiumhistorier og 9000+ magasiner og aviser.
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Only £65k a month to live like Boy George
The Karma Chameleon singer listed his house for £17m in 2022, turning down offers. Now, he's looking for a tenant
Welcome to London, unicorn capital of Europe
We're flying far ahead of anywhere outside US for tech investment
Arteta's Arsenal evolution The next phase
Malik Ouzia and Simon Collings assess how the Spaniard will try to bring down Man City after he signs up for another three years with the title in his sights
Title fight catches fire after Gunners embrace dark side
Arsenal-City clashes take on a welcome edge of animosity
Whack the hippy gong-boho's back
It happened in Paris one grey February day. Sienna Miller was in an oversized, black leather jacket, lace-trimmed silk slip and clumpy great wedges.
There's a Starlink waiting in the sky... 7,000 in fact.Can Elon Musk stop them crashing to Earth?
As he was preparing his fields for seeding this year, Barry Sawchuk came across a giant slab of space debris. It had come from a spacecraft belonging to Elon Musk’s company, SpaceX.
'Politicians are only into power-mongering, corruption and cronyism'
We speak to alt revolutionary DEEPAK CHOPRA about biomarkers, his digital twin and his work to save humanity from disease
I've been waiting for a production of Godotthis brilliant all my life
Ben Whishaw and Lucian Msamati bring a potent, tragicomic chemistry to James Macdonald’s rich revival of Samuel Beckett’s challenging play.
Trust me, the Ritz is London's bestrestaurant
To whom we turn in moments of gloom and glory can be instructive, a filter of our truest friends. I've fallen out with the Ritz a couple of times, including once after a visit to the bar which didn’t warrant a review (“But you said it was lovely!” they said.
'Healing is a dirty word'
After four traumatic years, FKA twigs is back with a new album -and a thrilling metamorphosis
