It's important we also focus on joyful pregnancy stories
The Independent|September 15, 2024
Weeks away from giving birth... and surrounded by traumatic headlines, depressing tales and stats, Lucy Thackray went in search of mums who are happy to share positive experiences
Lucy Thackray
It's important we also focus on joyful pregnancy stories

In 10 weeks time, I have to eject a whole human from my body. The timing couldn’t be more awkward, my due date arriving in the midst of a year that’s been especially fraught for expectant mothers. In May, the all-party parliamentary group’s birth trauma report was released, identifying damning concerns from patients, midwives and doctors about the NHS’s maternity units. The complaints have intensified on social media recently, too. Everything – whether it’s dramatic emergency C-sections, unwelcome inductions, tearing, episiotomies or days-long labours – is now neatly packaged into 30-second nightmare scenarios and served up on expectant mothers’ feeds.

Don’t get me wrong: it’s great that women are being given a voice when it comes to traumatic experiences and poor maternity care. I want the typical NHS birth experience to improve just as much as anyone else. But with all this noise out there, it can be difficult to imagine anything except the worst.

In truth, though, the chats I’ve found most motivating, and most encouraging, are the good birth stories. The ones just a handful of friends have slipped me under the table – voices lowered, almost apologetic. It’s not fashionable to say “I loved it”, but it does happen. People say they felt powerful, in control, or tapped into an intensely feminine, communal magic when working with their midwives.

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