Wandering over to the buffet table, my eye trailed over all the delicious festive food. Quiches, crisps, cheesecake how could I resist? I was far from hungry - the day before I'd stuffed myself full of turkey and all the trimmings, and today, I was enjoying a Christmas buffet, already scoffing a packed plateful. But it all looked so good.
It was Christmas 2020 and, barely able to squeeze into my size-22 clothes, I was constantly conscious of my weight. But what does it matter?' I thought, popping a sausage roll into my mouth and another two on to my plate. Having spent most of the year working from home in lockdown, I barely saw anyone anyway.
Going back to the table, we all took turns to open our brightly-wrapped presents and I hardly noticed my partner Andy, then 55, taking a picture of me ripping open a gift. If I had, I wouldn't have been too happy. Although I could ignore my weight, I didn't want it captured on camera.
OUT OF CONTROL
Growing up, I'd never been what you'd call a slim child - in fact, as a teenager, my grandma had remarked on my 'thunder thighs', a comment that hurt. But I was always sporty and, at 5ft 3in, I was fairly happy as a size-12.
In 1991 when I was 21, I met Andy and two years later, in 1993, we had Amy. I could never quite shift my baby weight, though. Then, in November 2004, I lost my dad to lung cancer. I was devastated and sought comfort in food. As my weight crept up, I just couldn't seem to control it.
In early 2006, I joined a weight-loss group and, within a year, managed to get down to my old weight again. But it was short-lived. I was made redundant from my credit control job and struggled to find work I enjoyed as much. When I went for an interview in 2008, I could no longer fasten up my size-12 suit.
Denne historien er fra December 04, 2023-utgaven av WOMAN'S OWN.
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Denne historien er fra December 04, 2023-utgaven av WOMAN'S OWN.
Start din 7-dagers gratis prøveperiode på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av utvalgte premiumhistorier og 9000+ magasiner og aviser.
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MIND OF MY OWN
The Woman's Own columnist has her say on the gender gap, cats and timed hugs
Check out CHICAGO
With a spectacular skyline, sandy beaches and great food, the Windy City is calling, says Zoe West
LET'S EMBRACE OUR CHRISTMAS TAT!
Becky Dickinson explains why she'll still be rocking around her tinsel-strewn tree this year
BURIED SECRETS
We look at the shocking cases of celebrities posthumously accused of being sexual predators-and how they got away with it
FESTIVE NO-BAKES
Pop on the Christmas tunes and whip up a batch of these easy sweet treats
PROTECT YOUR SMILE
Are you doing enough to look after your teeth and gums?
'TIS THE SEASON TO SHINE!
At last, Hayley McCrossan, 39, feels fit and healthy
FOR THE LOVE OF TOM
When Deborah Mitchell, 57, lost her son, she vowed to help other families facing the same heartbreak
THE NURSE WHO LEFT MY GRANDAD FOR DEAD belict
Rachael Fealey, 31, had one question for the woman who killed her beloved Grampa - how could you?
Coleen's MONEY WORRIES
What are the reasons behind her financial and marriage fears?