THREE TIMES A BRIDESMAID

After losing 6st, Beth Cross, 32, vowed she'd never let herself go again

- FRANCES LEATE, MATT BARBOUR

Smoothing down the stretchy material on my size 22 dark green bridesmaid dress, I smiled with all the fake confidence I could muster. A sea of faces looked back at me as I nervously clutched a piece of paper and felt my face redden. It was April 2022 and I was about to give a speech as bridesmaid at my best friend’s wedding. Only, I felt horrendous – so self-conscious of my 5ft 5in, 16st frame.  of my 5ft 5in, 16st frame.

I’d spent the morning of Sophie’s wedding reluctantly posing for photos with her other bridesmaids, trying desperately to lean sideways in the hope I wouldn’t look so massive beside the other slim women. But I was ashamed of how I looked and as I stood in front of a hundred of Sophie’s guests in the dining hall of a huge glamorous castle, there was nowhere to hide.

Glancing at my partner Rob, then 43, for reassurance, I did my best to push feelings of self-hatred away, and focus on Sophie’s day. Today was about her - the girl I’d known since we were both toddling around together at nursery - not me. Afterwards, Sophie wrapped me in a hug. ‘Thank you,’ she beamed. I sat down, relieved it was over, and spent the rest of my meal wondering how I’d let things get so bad.