Lessons In Love

MediaCorp actress Rebecca Lim has been dreaming of her perfect wedding – although she hasn’t been proposed to yet. She opens up to Steve Thio about love, failed relationships, and what truly matters in one now.

- Steve Thio

What’s love truly all about for you? 

I’ve learnt that on its own, the love between two willing parties is pretty straightforward and precious. That’s how I’d want it to really be for me when my turn comes.

Sadly, things get super complicated when one party or the other lets other people in and they cross the line. You know, when friends, relatives and others think that it is perfectly okay to get involved and air their opinions.

Did something happen to make you think this way? 

Yes, and never again! You see, in my previous relationships, I was always seeking approval from my family and close friends. I used to think that it was important that the man for me had to be someone they would approve of, and who would fit into my social circles.

Sometimes, their approval was based on very superficial reasons, like whether or not we’d look good in a photograph, for instance. Other times, the same educational level or similar family and social backgrounds would come under the microscope because they naturally assumed that your background determined your relationship and future.

Thank goodness I soon woke up to the fact that, for too long, I had entered into relationships for the sake of others and not myself!

You’re 31 this year. People generally believe one should get married in one’s 20s. Do you feel any pressure? 

Yeah, by society’s standards, I should be married with two kids by now! But after going through a few relationships and more life experiences, I realised  that I did not have to conform to what others thought or expected from me.