Bullying, sexual abuse or just a culture of silence. There are many ways in which our children's voices can be taken away from them. Here is how to raise children who know they have a voice.
Your children are growing up in a world that’s far different from the one you grew up in. Everything’s much faster, and expectations are different. So the way you were raised is no longer a good guide on how to raise your children.
This means that you will have to go back to first principles for guidance. Especially when helping your children to understand society and the difference between right and wrong.
For example, most people assume that doing the right thing’s the same as obeying the law. But something that’s legal may not be moral. Like apartheid, for example.
So it’s important to help your children understand that morality is rooted in universal ethical principles like racial equality, human rights, and democratically created laws. They need to know that people should stick to those principles even when their country’s laws violate them.
People only began to think like this around 1700. Before that, no-one questioned evils that had existed for millennia - like slavery, religious violence and the persecution of minorities. It is modern thinking about universal human rights which led visionary leaders like Martin Luther King to protest against the laws of their time.
But such thinking is constantly under threat. So you need to encourage your children’s moral development, rather than simply instructing them on what's right and wrong. That way, they will become active citizens and inspiring leaders.
HOW DO YOU DO THAT?
Start by discussing every aspect of their lives with them. Age-appropriate family discussions help children to understand difficult social issues. Especially thorny subjects like corruption. Many parents duck such subjects completely but children who can talk comfortably to their parents about difficult subjects will grow up to be far more successful in life.
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