Beating Diabetes Shame
Diabetic Living Australia|September - October 2018

Are you ashamed of your diabetes? Afraid of judgement, Ilene Raymond Rush kept hers a secret for years, before deciding to accept her diagnosis and take control of the shame game

Ilene Raymond Rush
Beating Diabetes Shame

HIDING DIABETES

It’s early March in 1985 and I’m in a hospital bathroom. My father is about to undergo a heart bypass; I’m huddled beside a sink, fighting to squeeze out a drop of blood for my new glucose monitor. But the more I try to extract the blood, the less cooperative my finger becomes. I’m scared of the lancet, scared of getting a reading above 8.3mmol/L. I hate the sight of my own blood. And what if one of my sisters wanders in on me midtest?

The truth is I’ve kept my condition a secret. I’m terrified of being forced to reveal it. Awaiting the verdict of the machine, I’m also swept with shame. Ever since my doctor told me I have gestational diabetes, I feel I’ve done something wrong to hurt my unborn child.

A LEGACY OF DIABETES

Diabetes was always a loaded topic in my family. My father – who was diagnosed with type 2 at age 30 after passing out at a party – never accepted his disease. He never followed a food plan or regularly exercised. That he lived until 89 was a testament to his many years of physical labour at his hardware store.

This story is from the September - October 2018 edition of Diabetic Living Australia.

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This story is from the September - October 2018 edition of Diabetic Living Australia.

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