![Confessions of a Male Model](https://cdn.magzter.com/1357654847/1660810649/articles/540Xk2YqD1660896504253/Daniel-Nieh-Take-No-Names.jpg)
Back in my salad days, I carried myself with swagger. The dashing raconteur-that's the role I liked to play. But today, I never turn on the charm the way I used to years ago. These days, I make a conscious effort to mellow my manner in mixed company.
I'm talking about man issues, which for decades I had confused with girl problems. That confusion sent me on a quest leading to some of the most desired and objectified women in the world. If I'd read different books, watched different movies, and looked up to different role models as a kid, I might've figured things out earlier. Instead, here I am with my hair turning gray and I'm still revising my understanding of the man I want to be.
My self-diagnosed girl problems began around puberty: I was that late bloomer with zits all over my face and a body like a heap of knees and elbows. Plus I rarely asked questions, and when I did, I had a habit of interrupting the answers.
I addressed my girl problems by cultivating, as the kids are saying, some of that main-character energy. I emulated popular kids who made clever remarks and told impressive stories. I read articles about my abdominal muscles and chugged a steady regimen of blended protein cocktails. I did all this with the vague goals of gazing into someone's eyes, riding horses with them, and maybe fighting a duel for their honor through I would've settled for just touching. My clumsy efforts did not lead me to meaningful relationships, which require skills I couldn't even name back then. But they did help me get scouted to become a model.
Denne historien er fra September 2022-utgaven av Esquire US.
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Denne historien er fra September 2022-utgaven av Esquire US.
Start din 7-dagers gratis prøveperiode på Magzter GOLD for å få tilgang til tusenvis av utvalgte premiumhistorier og 9000+ magasiner og aviser.
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![The (Shocking! Twisted! Brilliant!) Mind of Zoë Kravitz - Zoë Kravitz directorial debut Blink Twice](https://reseuro.magzter.com/100x125/articles/2243/1799393/e3HyYN4N51723805050063/crp_humorBlink-Twice-movie-Kravitzdirectorial-debut-filmaking-films-entertainment-woman-film-director-women-movies-movies-Zo-Kravitz-California-Kravitz-Bonet-Tatum-Lenny-Pussy-Island-comedy-Blink-Twice.jpg)
The (Shocking! Twisted! Brilliant!) Mind of Zoë Kravitz - Zoë Kravitz directorial debut Blink Twice
Kubrick. Tarantino. Peele... Kravitz? With the thirty-five-year-old's directorial debut the deeply unsettling psychological thriller Blink Twice she is redefining herself as a creative force. Over two days in New York, she lets us into her world.
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Vote or Die - I'm a Black man in Arizona participating in the most consequential election of my lifetime whether certain white men want me to or not.
You knew some vote-or-die, do-it-to-honor the-sacrifices-of-the-ancestors, you-can't-complain-if-youdon't-participate Black folks. But you also knew scores who didn't trouble themselves with participating at all. Into your 30s you felt somewhere between those philosophical poles, among those who, each election cycle, needed convincing that their vote mattered a good gotdamn.
![I AM FALLING APART](https://reseuro.magzter.com/100x125/articles/2243/1799393/nIJt_wojx1724329746662/I-AM-FALLING-APART.jpg)
I AM FALLING APART
At 48, I realized my professional dream of publishing a novel. Around that time, also gota staph infection, became diabetic, and started losing my vision. Will sce the end of my story?
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WITH VINTAGE, SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF
The world is filled with fake throwbacks and questionable graphics. But real-deal, old-school sailing gear never disappoints.
![WATCH CLOSELY](https://reseuro.magzter.com/100x125/articles/2243/1799393/4ZVR9Ez6U1724329626306/WATCH-CLOSELY.jpg)
WATCH CLOSELY
The finer details of Parmigiani Fleurier’s latest masterpiece reveal why the maker has become such a cult favorite
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Giorgio Armani Is Never Done
We sat down with the maestro to chat about, well...everything
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SOLAR POWER
What does the feeling of the sun shining on you smell like? Pharrell’s first fragrance for Louis Vuitton, LVERS, seeks to answer that question.
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REBIRTH OF AN ICON
The Cartier Trinity, a favorite of legends like Gary Cooper and Alain Delon, gets a bold new look
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Molto Rawdog!
You've heard of rawdogging” a flight? How about an entire trip to Italy? I believe in it with the zeal of the convert.
![THE CYNIC THE TWO NATIONS](https://reseuro.magzter.com/100x125/articles/2243/1799393/9Zp7ELM2b1724327670261/THE-CYNIC-THE-TWO-NATIONS.jpg)
THE CYNIC THE TWO NATIONS
It's been twenty years since then. state senator Obama assured us there was not a liberal America and a conservative America. In that time, a new country has been building with fearful momentum. Can anything be donc to stop it?