The Myth of the Homewrecker

"Although it takes two to tango, the blame is disproportionately put on women when it comes to cheating."

- By Dana Hamilton

America is obsessed with homewreckers. From Monica Lewinsky to Angelina Jolie to Jordyn Woods, we have a history of demonizing the (usually single) “other woman.” But why is significantly less blame for the end of a relationship put on the person who actually cheated?

There is so much vitriol for women who “broke up” a marriage. Let’s take Kristen Stewart’s case in 2012, for example, in which a celebrity magazine published pictures of her canoodling with then-married director Rupert Sanders. It was so explosive, Donald Trump tweeted, “Robert Pattinson should not take back Kristen Stewart. She cheated on him like a dog and will do it again—just watch.” Yet there weren’t tweets talking about the decisions Rupert Sanders made that ultimately led to his divorce. I had to google his name for this article because, like you, I had no recollection of who the hell he was. But that Trump tweet? Infamous.

Although it takes two to tango, the blame is disproportionately put on women when it’s two cheaters in hetero relationships. And it’s even worse when it’s a single woman “breaking up” a relationship—even if the “other woman” didn’t know the man she was dating wasn’t single. Homewrecking is an outdated notion—and I’m not really sure it existed in the first place. If a relationship’s foundation was already cracked enough for someone to cheat, there was no home to be wrecked.