It's a PAIN LIVING WITH MR PERFECT

Since writer Clare O’Reilly married Jon 13 years ago, he has not put a foot wrong. In a startlingly honest piece, Clare reveals why sometimes a little imperfection may be better

- Clare O'Reilly

We started dating back in 2002, and I should have got an inkling of my husband’s perfect moral fibre from the very beginning. I called in sick to work, planning to surprise him as he worked from home. However, while I turned up with thoughts of a long, lazy, romantic lunch, Jon refused to ditch his responsibilities, even though we were supposed to be in the first throes of love.

I married Mr Perfect anyway, but his ridiculous moral compass has come to be a bone of contention. Simply put, I’m bored with being married to such a paragon of virtue.

Jon is so unlike me it’s disarming, but it turns out I’m not alone. New research from the University of Amsterdam has found that, while it’s beneficial in nature for species to be similar, when it comes to humans it’s not that straightforward.

The study looked at the personality traits of 4,464 couples and found agreeableness — a trait associated with trust and empathy — in both partners is vital for a relationship to succeed. But researchers also found that, when one partner is conscientious, the coupling can actually work better if the other is less so – which may go some way to explaining why Jon and I have lasted so long.