‘My best friend dying was as heartbreaking as losing Dad’

Teacher Kerry Brindle, 46, lives in Devon with wife Rose, 47. Here, she tells new about the pain of losing a soulmate

- LEBBY EYRES

Even though it’s been five years since she died, it’s hard for me to talk about the loss of my best friend Niki without crying. We’d been soulmates for a quarter of a century, ever since we’d met on the school bus to college-aged 17.

The grief we feel for a best friend isn’t recognised in the same way as when we lose a close family member or a partner. There’s still a stigma around it, yet I think it is just as painful. I’ve shared so much with Niki over the years. We partied together, cried together when I lost my dad, watched each other get married. Now I don’t have anyone to share those memories with. We’ll never be two little old ladies laughing about the crazy things we used to get up to.

We grew up close to Ringwood in the New Forest, and from the moment we first met, Niki and I just clicked. We started at the same college in Brockenhurst. On the second day on the bus, this girl asked if she could sit down next to me. I said, “Yeah, but don’t expect me to talk to you because I’m not in the mood.”

The next day she did the same thing, and I laughed. And that was it. We were best friends. We loved going clubbing in nearby Christchurch or Bournemouth. Our anthem was Dreamer by Livin’ Joy. If Niki had lost me in the club, when that song came on she always knew to look for the nearest pole, as she knew I’d be wrapped around it, dancing! We were always laughing, we loved being young together. When she got married in her early twenties, I was her bridesmaid, and she was there when I married my wife Rose in 2007.

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