An Experience to Cherish
Outlook|March 21, 2024
Growing older gives you perspective and hindsight. You have a long trajectory to look back on and learn life lessons
Urvashi Butalia
An Experience to Cherish

EARLIER this year, I turned 72. And so far, I am not doddering, although I expect that will come soon enough. But when I mention my age to people and at this age there's none of that reluctance about revealing your age that, as young people, we might have had-they react with surprise. They tell me I don't look 72. But what does 72 look like? Old? What does old look like? Grey? But grey (hair I mean) is fashionable these days and one often sees silver/grey/white highlights in what is otherwise black or brown hair.

Wrinkles? Even those are not unique to older people. And some don't have them at all. The other day I was talking to a friend who is two years short of 80. She's glamorous, spry, and beautiful; not a single wrinkle on her smooth face. Meanwhile, the woman who sweeps the street outside our office, young at 35, has a deeply-lined and creased face, also beautiful in a different way, but one which tells a story not of age, but of hardship and struggle.

So what does "old" have to do with it? I'm not sure. Although there's no doubt that once you cross the given thresholds of age-which have very likely been put in place for administrative reasons-you become more conscious of your age, and of ageing. Forty feels like excitement; fifty, like maturity and stability; sixty, like a line has been crossed, and at 70?

To me, most times it doesn't feel very different-in my head I am the same person I always was, older and wiser yes, but that comes with every year and every decade you put on. But all around you there are reminders that tell you something different.

This story is from the March 21, 2024 edition of Outlook.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.

This story is from the March 21, 2024 edition of Outlook.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.

MORE STORIES FROM OUTLOOKView All
Criminal Amnesia
Outlook

Criminal Amnesia

The focus may have now shifted to the Kolkata gang rape case, but questions about the sexual violence in Manipur since May 2023 remain unanswered

time-read
10 mins  |
September 11, 2024
To Rape A Wife
Outlook

To Rape A Wife

Survivors of marital rape face twin hurdles: a lack of legal framework to deal with these cases and the social stigma that comes with reporting them

time-read
7 mins  |
September 11, 2024
A City Violated
Outlook

A City Violated

Public outburst of anger over the rape and murder of a junior doctor in Kolkata has left the Mamata Banerjee government puzzled, worried

time-read
6 mins  |
September 11, 2024
The Forest of Loss
Outlook

The Forest of Loss

From a legal perspective, justice appears to have been served in the 2017 Gudiya rape and murder case at Kotkhai, Himachal Pradesh. But several questions persist

time-read
7 mins  |
September 11, 2024
Here, Nobody Speaks of the Wounds
Outlook

Here, Nobody Speaks of the Wounds

Muhammad Iqbal Shah's 14-year-old cousin was gang-raped and murdered at Handwara town, Kupwara, in 2007. The family is still trudging along the long road to justice

time-read
5 mins  |
September 11, 2024
She Must Have Been Afraid
Outlook

She Must Have Been Afraid

The 2012 Delhi gang rape is reflective of a systematic failure to cleanse the societal malaise

time-read
5 mins  |
September 11, 2024
The Burning Woman
Outlook

The Burning Woman

UP has the highest rate of crimes against women, and the district of Unnao has seen some of the State's most gruesome cases

time-read
5 mins  |
September 11, 2024
Naked (vs.) Justice
Outlook

Naked (vs.) Justice

On March 14, 2006, Latabai and her son, six, were paraded naked in a village in Solapur. Less than six months later, four members of a Dalit family were paraded naked; mother & daughter were allegedly gang-raped

time-read
6 mins  |
September 11, 2024
Songlines of Chambal
Outlook

Songlines of Chambal

How do the residents of Sheikhpur Gudha, Phoolan Devi's village in Uttar Pradesh, remember her: as a survivor, a rebel, a leader?

time-read
10 mins  |
September 11, 2024
Don't You Remember My Story?
Outlook

Don't You Remember My Story?

A child gang rape survivor's 12-year long ordeal in Sikar, Rajasthan shows how calls for punishment of perpetrators don't always mean empathy for the victim

time-read
8 mins  |
September 11, 2024