Mary Coustas - The Miracle Was That I Didn't Give Up Trying

Mary Coustas’ daughter, Jamie, just might have been the most longed-for little girl in the world, and now she’s one of the most loved. Mary talks to Samantha Trenoweth about the taboos she confronted on her heartbreaking IVF journey, and about the surprises that motherhood brings.

- Samantha Trenoweth

Mary Coustas smiles and her dark eyes shine as three-year old Jamie runs across the courtyard and into her arms. The joy in the air is palpable. Mary and Jamie exchange the secret looks, private jokes and effortless understanding of mothers and daughters who share a spontaneous, unconditional love. After a herculean battle for a child, Mary has, at 52, become a thoroughly relaxed, warm, natural mum.

“I’m good at difficult stuff too,” she laughs, walking across cobblestones to the barn, where Jamie has spotted the miniature white pony, Thumbelina, “and I hope I don’t invite trouble because I definitely think I need some long service leave from it now.”

The last decade of Mary’s life has been “gigantic”. The actress and comedian is best known as the creator of the quirky Greek-Australian every woman, Effie, who was introduced to Aussie audiences back in 1989 on TV comedy, Acropolis Now. But between 2005 and 2015, Mary’s career took second place to her struggle to become a mother – a struggle that began just six weeks after she married her true love, the advertising executive, George Betsis.

A laparoscopy detected blocked fallopian tubes. Mary was 40, George was 45. She’d always been interested in adoption – “even before Angelina and Brad were born, I’d made a decision one day I’d adopt” – but Australian law requires less than a 40-year age difference between parents and child. Mary was told her only hope of becoming a mother was through IVF.