Why Are You So Obsessed With Me?

Your ex has entered a new relationship. Good for him! But then, for some strange reason, his new girlfriend starts to keep tabs on you via Instagram...

- Sophie Hong

So your ex has a new girlfriend… and she social media-stalks you A LOT. You know this because she accidentally double-tapped on one of your pics during a stalking spree, or blatantly “liked” your photos. If it all gets too much for you, here’s what you can do about it.

Figure out the why

It’s natural to be curious about your current beau’s exes. However, there’s a difference between checking out his ex’s Instagram profile once or twice, versus a deep dive into each and every one of her social media accounts.

“[The former] may be driven by curiosity and the need to mark one’s territory; the other may be driven by fear and insecurity,” says Jean Chen XM, director of Relationship Matters and a psychotherapist with 12 years of experience.

If you find yourself at the receiving end, “[She may be trying] to verify whether she’s better than you, or if she can duplicate what he likes about you and avoid what he doesn’t like about you,” explains Jean. She might also be trying to suss out whether he still has remnant feelings for you via your social media interactions (if there are any).

How to deal