The Cocking Cracker In The Copse

Jamie Chandler has a rather amusing take on a battle of underlever vs break-barrel rifles whilst out huntin

- Jamie Chandler

To the accompaniment of the theme from ‘Rocky’: Ladies and Gentleman! Guests from near and far, honoured readers and those who just look at the pictures! Terry Doe Legends of Sport, in association with Dave Barham World Wide Events, brings you the clash of the century. A once-in-a-lifetime fight to the canvas. The battle to decide the champion of champions. An intergalactic dust-up that leaves Star Wars looking like an octogenarian argument over who’s first in the undies sale aisle at M&S. It’s the one, the only, the ‘not to be repeated tomorrow because the weather’s looking dicey’ fight you’ve always wanted! Join us for the ‘underlever v break-barrel’ battle we’ve all been waiting for, to crown the victor ‘Ultimate Cocker’. We’re calling it ‘The Cocking Cracker in the Copse’. This Armageddon-like fight is brought to you exclusively through the pay-per-view – or read your mate’s – Air Gunner magazine!

THE CONTENDERS

You are privileged to join us in an exclusive squirrel- and pigeon-ridden 10-acre wood near Basingstoke, home turf to one of our fighting Titans this afternoon. This home crowd advantage could well prove a boon in the ring, but possible overconfidence could lead to simple mistakes, giving the visitor an opportunity to exploit.

In the red chinos, snazzy blue Christmas jumper and gilet, we have Tom. This deadly-eyed, farmer extraordinaire is more a shotgun and full-bore rifle man, but today he’s representing break-barrel lovers everywhere with the awesome Diana 340 Ntec Premium Pro Compact in .22.