Places, please
New Zealand Listener|September 23-29 2023
As the election campaign kicks up a gear, politicians start behaving as if they've won lead roles in a local amateur dramatics show.
Michele Hewitson
Places, please

Pirates. Petulance. The Prefu. Who'd have thought the first official week of Campaign 2023 would deliver the makings of a Gilbert and Sullivan musical.

With the curtain finally up, the most anticipated all-singingall-dancing act was Treasury opening the government books. This is known, rather boringly, as the Pre-election Economic and Fiscal Update, or Prefu - an acronym pleasingly close to Snafu, or Situation Normal: All Fucked Up. The books have to be opened before a general election so that an incoming government doesn't get a terrible shock when they open the fridge of our nation's scungy flat to find that all it contains is a half-eaten pottle of yoghurt with somebody else's name on it.

People get terribly excited about the Prefu. No, they don't. RNZ's business editor, the wry Gyles Beckford, could barely contain his lack of excitement at the prospect of his forthcoming trip to Treasury offices. Morning Report co-host Corin Dann asked: "Do they give you lunch?" There may have been a snort. A free lunch in these fiscally straitened times? Don't be daft. "No. You can bring your own coffee sachet and they'll give you a splash of water," said Beckford, hardly bitter at all.

In an expert analysis, then, the Prefu amounted to not quite a Snafu or a half-eaten pottle of yoghurt. The big news seems to be that the country will probably avoid recession. The deficit, meanwhile, was up to a whopping $11.4 billion from the forecast $7.6 billion in May's Budget. Interest rates may rise again. Only economists, Treasury wonks and doomsayers have a clue what any of this means. Maybe, probably some time in 2026, we will be able to afford a whole pottle of yoghurt.

CRINGE FACTOR

Bu hikaye New Zealand Listener dergisinin September 23-29 2023 sayısından alınmıştır.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.

Bu hikaye New Zealand Listener dergisinin September 23-29 2023 sayısından alınmıştır.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.

NEW ZEALAND LISTENER DERGISINDEN DAHA FAZLA HIKAYETümünü görüntüle
First-world problem
New Zealand Listener

First-world problem

Harrowing tales of migrants attempting to enter the US highlight the political failure to fully tackle the problem.

time-read
3 dak  |
September 9, 2024
Applying intelligence to AI
New Zealand Listener

Applying intelligence to AI

I call it the 'Terminator Effect', based on the premise that thinking machines took over the world.

time-read
2 dak  |
September 9, 2024
Nazism rears its head
New Zealand Listener

Nazism rears its head

Smirky Höcke, with his penchant for waving with a suspiciously straight elbow and an open palm, won't get to be boss of either state.

time-read
2 dak  |
September 9, 2024
Staying ahead of the game
New Zealand Listener

Staying ahead of the game

Will the brave new world of bipartisanship that seems to be on offer with an Infrastructure Commission come to fruition?

time-read
4 dak  |
September 9, 2024
Grasping the nettle
New Zealand Listener

Grasping the nettle

Broccoli is horrible. It smells, when being cooked, like cat pee.

time-read
3 dak  |
September 9, 2024
Hangry? Eat breakfast
New Zealand Listener

Hangry? Eat breakfast

People who don't break their fast first thing in the morning report the least life satisfaction.

time-read
3 dak  |
September 9, 2024
Chemical reaction
New Zealand Listener

Chemical reaction

Nitrates in processed meats are well known to cause harm, but consumed from plant sources, their effect is quite different.

time-read
4 dak  |
September 9, 2024
Me and my guitar
New Zealand Listener

Me and my guitar

Australian guitarist Karin Schaupp sticks to the familiar for her Dunedin concerts.

time-read
2 dak  |
September 9, 2024
Time is on my side
New Zealand Listener

Time is on my side

Age does not weary some of our much-loved musicians but what keeps them on the road?

time-read
7 dak  |
September 9, 2024
The kids are not alright
New Zealand Listener

The kids are not alright

Nuanced account details how China's blessed generation has been replaced by one consumed by fear and hopelessness.

time-read
4 dak  |
September 9, 2024