Pulling on a blazer, my son James, then 10, grinned at himself in the mirror.
'Does it look all right, Mum?' he asked.
'Really smart and grown up,' I smiled, ruffling his blonde mop of hair.
As James disappeared back into the changing room to try on his spare shirts, I marvelled at how it felt like only yesterday that I was packing him off for his first day of infant school. Now it was 2017 and we were uniform shopping for his first day at secondary school. And he looked the part in his black blazer, crisp shirt and shiny shoes.
It didn't last long, of course. As soon as James started at school, he'd come home with grass stains on his knees, ketchup down his untucked shirt and scuffs on his shoes. He'd be in the door mere minutes before ripping off his uniform, leaving it in a pile on his bedroom floor.
'I asked you to hang this up!" I'd sigh. But I'd been through this before with my older boys Dylan, then 16, and Jack, 14. And the truth was, James was my baby - I let him get away with more than I should.
MOVIE NIGHTS
We were close, and loved spending nights on the sofa, watching scary films. In September 2019, we had one of those special evenings together after his dad Martin*, then 45, had gone to bed. I let him stay up late and we munched popcorn and sweets together as we hid behind a cushion as horror films played. Working long shifts as a carer, I always cherished spending some time with James one-on-one.
Then, a month later in October 2019, I left early in the morning for my 12-hour shift, leaving all the boys in bed. It was an ordinary school day and I expected to cycle home that evening to find the boys doing their homework in their rooms.
POLICE WAITING
But when I turned on to our road around 7pm, I saw police cars lining the street.
Bu hikaye WOMAN'S OWN dergisinin October 02, 2023 sayısından alınmıştır.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber ? Giriş Yap
Bu hikaye WOMAN'S OWN dergisinin October 02, 2023 sayısından alınmıştır.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 9,000+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber? Giriş Yap
MIND OF MY OWN
The Woman's Own columnist has her say on the gender gap, cats and timed hugs
Check out CHICAGO
With a spectacular skyline, sandy beaches and great food, the Windy City is calling, says Zoe West
LET'S EMBRACE OUR CHRISTMAS TAT!
Becky Dickinson explains why she'll still be rocking around her tinsel-strewn tree this year
BURIED SECRETS
We look at the shocking cases of celebrities posthumously accused of being sexual predators-and how they got away with it
FESTIVE NO-BAKES
Pop on the Christmas tunes and whip up a batch of these easy sweet treats
PROTECT YOUR SMILE
Are you doing enough to look after your teeth and gums?
'TIS THE SEASON TO SHINE!
At last, Hayley McCrossan, 39, feels fit and healthy
FOR THE LOVE OF TOM
When Deborah Mitchell, 57, lost her son, she vowed to help other families facing the same heartbreak
THE NURSE WHO LEFT MY GRANDAD FOR DEAD belict
Rachael Fealey, 31, had one question for the woman who killed her beloved Grampa - how could you?
Coleen's MONEY WORRIES
What are the reasons behind her financial and marriage fears?