BEWARE OF THE MODERN CAOPER

The art of disappearing in the digital dating world.

- Snigdha Jauhari

In the modern digital and virtual world, humans are experiencing new phenomena like never before - Casper the ghost is back! But with a new style of ghosting! The difference is that in earlier times, such 'beings' came from the other world and left us feeling 'boohoohoo,' but today, we date them and often are left feeling boohoohoo with an added feeling of '#*#^^$#'.

Ghosting is when someone (or you) abruptly stops all communication and contact with the other person. No explanations are given. No response is made to any communication received from them. There could be total silence, ignoring, or being cuttingly curt! It can happen in any relationship. However, here we will discuss ghosting in the context of dating.

Signs of Ghosting

Such things are highly situational. You are likely to instinctively feel the silence. Only in some exceptional circumstances, i.e., if your girlfriend works on an oil rig or your boyfriend is travelling to Iceland, but in an otherwise normal situation, receiving no response for three days is enough to consider yourself ghosted.

However, a word of caution here: if several days pass and you do not hear from this person, don't jump to the worst possible conclusion. It is a good idea to reach out and let the person know that you enjoyed your time together and would like to see him or her again. Alternatively, you could send a "Hey, haven't heard from you. If you are not interested, that's okay. Just let me know." or simply ask humorously, "Haven't heard from you. Am I being ghosted out?" Your attempt to reach out opens the door for the other person to be receptive. If the person doesn't respond to your second message also or gives you a weak, watery response, then you may decide to hang this up for good.

Apart from receiving the silent treatment, other signs tell you that you are being ghosted.

These are: