Wanted: ONE MAN

There's a gender-balance crisis at the charity shop

'We desperately need a man,' said Mrs Beasley, the manager of our charity shop.

'Speak for yourself,' said my colleague Wendy, which was quite brave, as Mrs B is renowned across five counties for having no sense of humour.

We'd just closed the shop, and were sitting in the storeroom enjoying a quiet cup of coffee and some jam doughnuts.

'That's not what I meant;' snapped Mrs B.

'It's all very well saying that,' I chipped in, 'but where are we going to find one? They never seem to last.

'That's men all over,' said Wendy. Isn't she a wag? In case you're wondering what we're talking about - and who can blame you? - we have decided to embrace charity shop equality.

Our shop needs more gender balance. Several men have volunteered to do their bit, but none has really lasted.

Mr Dear has helped out from time to time, it's true, but he's really more at home varnishing the cricket pavilion or helping out at the rugby club, polishing the trophy cabinet or repairing the scrum halves or whatever it is he does there.