EDITOR VS JETSKI

Hugo takes his first ride on the latest Kawasaki stand-up jet Ski to see if this pumped up speed machine really is the next big thing in Motoryacht toys

- Hugo Andreae

MAN

YEAR OF BUILD 1968

LOA 6ft 1in (1.85m)

BEAM 33in (0.83m)

WEIGHT 73kg (on a good day)

ENGINE Been round the clock

FUEL Grape Nuts (mainly)

PRICE A couple of pints

MACHINE

YEAR OF BUILD 2020

LOA 8ft 9in (2.66m)

BEAM 2ft 6in (0.76m)

WEIGHT 250kg

ENGINE 150hp @ 7,500rpm, 1,498cc four stroke

FUEL 23 litres

PRICE from £10,899

Being a 52-year-old bloke, I’m not usually one for paying much attention to instruction manuals but having never attempted to ride a stand-up jet ski before, I thought it might be worth a quick peek. I’m very glad I did because page 1 contains some rather important advice to wear wetsuit bottoms or some other from of protective clothing. The consequences of ignoring this are also spelled in alarmingly anatomical detail. The precise wording is, “As a result of falling into water or being near the jet thrust nozzle, water can be forced into body cavities such as the rectum.”

Not the kind of thing you usually expect to read when getting to know a new toy but it certainly caught my attention. If this seems a little over dramatic perhaps it’s worth a quick reminder of what we’re dealing with here and why we’re even writing about a jetski in a magazine about motor boats.

JET SKI EVOLUTION