Shore to IMPRESS!

JEREMY FINDS HIS BLISS AT THE BEACH, THANKS TO A NEW ACQUISITION THAT KEEPS HIM OCCUPIED ALL DAY

- JEREMY

I don’t mean to brag, but sometimes in one’s life one finds oneself possessing an object of desire that sets one apart. For me, that time has arrived: I have an Instant Beach Shelter.

Yes. And not one of those run-of-the-mill, flimsy shade huts that spring up all over New Zealand beaches in summer. No, mine is different. Better. It has quick-release sand pockets and a fold-up screen. It says so on the bag.

A bag only big enough to hold my Instant Beach Shelter until it was first unfurled, upon which the bag shrunk and will no longer allow the Instant Beach Shelter back inside.

No matter. I still love my IBS. It’s the closest we’ll ever get to beachfront property.