I Gave Away Two Of My Children

Rebecca Henderson is best friends with the woman raising her children. Here’s her remarkable story…

- Kristina Beanland And Rebecca Wright

Seeing my five children playing happily together always makes me smile. without doubt, they are my greatest achievement. So, it might surprise you to hear that, while I love them all unconditionally, I gave two of them away, to be raised by another woman.

My journey to motherhood wasn’t easy. My husband Chris and I had been trying for a baby for years before the GP recommended IVF.

In February 2006, after my eggs were harvested and fertilised with Chris’s sperm, experts at a fertility clinic were able to create 13 embryos – two of which were implanted in my womb. Two weeks later, after a blood test, the clinic called me. ‘You’re pregnant!’ said the nurse.

I was so happy, but the pregnancy itself was terrifying. I was sure every twinge meant something bad. Even after we learnt we’d be having twins, I refused to buy matching outfits or a double pram. It wasn’t until Abigail and Rachele were born, in September 2006, that I let myself fall in love with them.

We adored our girls, and Chris and I decided our family was complete. With the IVF success rate under 30%, I couldn’t bear any more heartbreak.

But that left us with a problem. In March 2008, the clinic called, asking what we’d like to do with our remaining embryos. We had two options – they could be thawed and destroyed, or donated to an anonymous couple. But to Chris and me, these embryos weren’t just a cluster of cells; they were our children. The idea of discarding them – or giving them away to strangers – felt cruel.