'THAT'S NOT MY BABY'
WOMAN'S OWN|January 06, 2025
Lying in the hospital bed, my husband Michael had tears of happiness in his eyes as he showed me a photo on his phone. 'Here she is,' he said proudly. 'This is our beautiful baby girl.'I stared at the photo and shook my head. 'No, that's not my baby,' I said. 'There must be a mistake.'It was August 2010 and I'd not long before had an emergency caesarean. I'd not had a chance to see Winnie when she arrived as she'd been whisked away for tests because she was nearly two months premature.
CLARE SWATMAN, LUCY LAING
'THAT'S NOT MY BABY'

I'd told Michael to go with her and while he was gone, and after I'd been brought back to the recovery ward, a social worker had come to see me. 'I've been sent to speak to you about caring for a child with Down's syndrome,' she'd told me.

I was taken aback. Winnie didn't have Down's syndrome - it had been confirmed with tests after our 20-week scan. 'I'm sorry, you're mistaken,' I'd told her. But then, Michael had appeared, showing me a photo on his phone of a blonde, pale little girl who looked nothing like me or Michael - who was half-Bangladeshi - and nothing like our other children Harry, then 17, Jack, 13, and Woody, four.

'I'm not her Mummy,' I repeated, certain that photos had been taken of the wrong child. There must have been some terrible mix-up.

But when I saw Michael's encouraging smile, I realised that I was, in fact, mistaken. This little girl was mine. Instead of the shock I'd first felt when I'd seen the photo, something new washed over me - a feeling that I had to do everything in my power to protect her.

For years, Michael and I had longed for another baby to complete our family so when we'd found out I was expecting again in March 2010, we were elated.

However, a blood test in those first weeks of pregnancy indicated there was a chance our baby had Down's syndrome, so we were referred for an in-depth scan on 19 April 2010.

MORE BOMBSHELLS

This all came back negative for Down's syndrome, much to our relief. But, of course, it was short-lived. After Winnie was born, and Michael showed me her photo, I just stared for ages in disbelief. Of course, I thought she was beautiful and realised her appearance wasn't all that unexpected as I'd actually been blonde as a baby, but it took a while for me to digest everything.

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