CATEGORIES

Mason a Reggae Boy now

MASON GREENWOOD has switched international allegiances from England to Jamaica.

SNOOZE CONTROL

Haaland won't be caught napping in front of goal

Tuch on the line

THOMAS TUCHEL has set up his own hotline to England players.

Trossard: I'm just a winner

LEANDRO TROSSARD insists he is not a moaner - just a winner.

Emery flops lose the plot

UNAI EMERY questioned the mentality of his Aston Villa players after a night to forget.

PAIN, SET 'N MATCH

Djok wins on 'one and a half legs'

Reis to the challenge

MANCHESTER CITY have signed their second defender in 24 hours after landing Vitor Reis.

DVT almost stopped me in my tracks

FEELING surprisingly tired and nauseous after a bracing walk up an Italian mountain on a summer's day, TV star Adrian Chiles assumed he was dehydrated.

Ange, mate, you need to get real

I'M so fed up of Ange Poste-no-clue.

IT'S SOL STUPID

SOL CAMPBELL thinks Tottenham fans hate him because of racism.

STAGE ALL READY FOR PALLADIUM

Debut tomorrow

Heat on Steidten

WEST HAM technical director Tim Steidten is under scrutiny at the club due to concerns they have overpaid for players.

Sister won't pay fair share for gift

SNUB TO 40-YEAR PRESSIE

Eli lifts Black Cats

SUNDERLAND ramped up the pressure at the top of the table with a 1-0 win over struggling Derby at Pride Park.

BEARMAN'S A TEEN PLAYER

OLIVER BEARMAN is \"no normal rookie\" and the Brit can help Haas to a breakout season in 2025.

Brian's in need of home

A DOPEY dog survived a 42ft fall out of a window and is now fighting fit and looking for a new owner.

Hair of the dog

THE fur-ce is back with seven-year-old Ewok the shih-tzu after a makeover saw an incredible 2.5lb of his matted locks removed.

Secret hot sex so bad

I'M infatuated with my girlfriend's flatmate.

HOT BREW PUTS BLADES ON TOP

SHEFFIELD UNITED leapfrogged Leeds as they went back to the top of the Championship after staging a second-half comeback at Swansea.

UNAI'S PIT STOP

Villa fail to seal grand prize in Monaco

'Pal' gloats at all my failures

MY best friend loves to see me fail. She comes to life anytime I complain about a bullying boss or cheating boyfriend.

EOWYN: LORD OF THE WINDS

Tolkien hero storm blasts in at 90mph

Jonas eyes Price drop

NATASHA JONAS has issued a \"be careful what you wish for\" warning to Lauren Price ahead of their all-British welterweight unification bout.

Garage in blast at Bozo

NIGEL Garage slammed Bozo Johnson for only being an \"occasional friend of Donald Trump\" after the ex-PM got a seat for the inauguration but he didn't.

EXCUSES EXCUSES EXCUSES

Agencies 'failed' to see danger

OOPSIE!

Who hasn't accidentally done a Nazi salute (twice) like Musky?

ELSWORTH LAUNCHING NEW CAREER

Former top jockey Dominic Elsworth is launching his training career after helping hundreds of people to turn their lives around.

RISE OF GUN COP WOMEN

Met drive after 13 join firearms unit

Lizzy's guitarist dies, 65

THIN Lizzy's John Sykes has died aged 65 after a battle with cancer.

My fury at 'lazy' jokes..

MY husband has \"jokingly\" started calling me lazy.