The final straw, the thing that had brought everything to a head, was choosing a loaf of bread. My husband, Neil, had asked me which loaf I’d prefer and I’d broken down in the middle of the supermarket. It wasn’t the first time something like this had happened and later that day, at a GP appointment Neil had booked for me, years of anguish came pouring out.
I explained how I felt lost and so very low, and how my weight seemed to control every aspect of my life. ‘I’m overweight and it seems too big a problem to fix,’ I explained.
He replied, gently, ‘I believe you’re clinically depressed.’
I’d never thought my weight struggles and my increasingly low mood might be connected. But it made sense.
For as long as I could remember, food had been a source of comfort, struggle, and shame, a response to every emotion. I’d snack on sausage rolls, cake, chocolate, and bread – my number-one trigger food – feeling unable to stop.
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